We Are Made of Us: Family, Grief, and the Stories We Carry with J.S. Park (S10-016)

 
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Have you ever caught yourself reacting to someone in a way that feels bigger than the moment? Or wondered why a family story you thought you’d left behind still seems to live in your body, your relationships, or the way you see the world? We like to think of ourselves as independent individuals. But what if understanding ourselves also means getting curious about the people and stories that shaped us?

This week on Typology, Anthony and I sit down with my friend J.S. Park, hospital chaplain and author of We Are Made of Us, to talk about the complicated, beautiful truth that none of us becomes ourselves alone. Joon’s work has brought him alongside people at life’s most vulnerable thresholds, where family histories and old patterns often come into view. He invites us to look at our own stories with a little more curiosity and a little less judgment.

We explore Han, a Korean concept that holds the ache of grief and sorrow carried across generations. It raises a question worth sitting with: What pain are we carrying that began before us, and how might naming it help us respond to the world with greater compassion?

And then there’s family. When a relationship has hurt us, how do we discern what love asks of us? Is the only choice to cut someone off or return to the way things were? Joon offers a more spacious question: What kind of relationship do you want with them? It doesn’t erase harm or make reconciliation the right choice in every situation. It creates room to reflect honestly on what is safe, what is possible, and what we may need to grieve.

We end with a moving reminder that sometimes love looks less like fixing and more like witnessing: listening to the stories of the people who came before us and letting them know their lives matter.

Whether you’re thinking about your Enneagram type, your family of origin, or the person you’re still becoming, I hope this conversation helps you look inward with honesty, meet others with compassion, and notice the ways we are made of one another.

In this episode:

  • How culture and family shape the way we understand our Enneagram type

  • The “June bow”: why we sometimes rush people through grief

  • Moving beyond codependence and independence toward interdependence

  • A more compassionate question to ask about difficult family relationships

  • Listening to our aging parents and honoring the stories they carry

 

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ABOUT J.S. PARK

J.S. Park is a hospital chaplain, published author, and online educator. He serves a 1000+ bed hospital and Level 1 Trauma Center, providing grief support and end-of-life care. J.S. has been interviewed by CNN, NPR, CBS News, Good Morning America, and The Today Show for his work in death and dying. He is the author of We Are Made of Us and As Long as You Need. He is board certified and also has a sixth degree black belt

 
 
 

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TYPE 1 | TYPE 2 | TYPE 3 | TYPE 4 | TYPE 5 | TYPE 6 | TYPE 7 | TYPE 8 | TYPE 9

 
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